| Concerns and comments of women |
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Ladina: I am pregnant with my 4th child. The first 3 children I delivered vaginally. Now I would like to have a c-section but the doctors don't respect my wish. They told me that it was unethical and too expensive. Do you know if I have a chance to get a c-section and how to achieve it ? The health system over here is sometimes very backwards. My last three deliveries were natural and I didn't have any complications. However, I asked for an epidural every time but never received one. They always had an excuse either it was too late or too early or I don't know what. Apparently most Canadian doctors try not to give you any drugs and just want you to have the natural experience. After three painful labour and deliveries though I am done with natural, and I would like to have a different, hopefully less stress-and painful experience. Anon: hi, i'm planning a baby for next year with my husband and we would like a caesarean. i have a few health problems and get ill quite quick and to have a caesarean would mean i don't get stressed. can you plz help me find some were in the leicestershire area. Rebecca: Firstly let me congratulate you on a fantastic website. I found you due to a link from a pregnancy website. I only wish I'd found you sooner. I suffer from extreme tocophobia (fear of childbirth), i have had counselling, CBT, Hypnosis all to not much avail. My partner and I desperately want to start a family and 2 years ago to our joy we fell pregnant. My GP had led me to believe that an ec would be more than expected for a case such as ours. Unfortunately the area I moved to refused point blank. At my early scan I was told in no uncertain terms that I would not be allowed an EC and to pull myself together. I sought a second opinion and was told the same thing. After much despair and more counselling I terminated the much wanted pregnancy. With no funds for private care I had resigned myself to never having children a very distressing thought. Your site has given me a glimmer of hope, and the realisation that there are people supportive of Ec's. Sandra: I have just registered and am looking for where in London I can elect to give birth by CS. I am trying to conceive at the moment, thought I had a choice but started researching online and it appears I may not know until 36 weeks! Not wanting to sound evil but that is too late to abort. I cannot give birth naturally and am terrified I will be put through this torture. I am thinking of not continuing to try to conceive. I see that some members have found willing doctors and consultants but nowhere on your website says where! Please help me. Jodie: Is it possible to request a cesarean on the NHS if there are no medical reasons for having one, as I have a phobia of childbirth. Suzanne: Please forward on information on reasons why individuals require a cesarean section - is this generally down to size (height and pelvis)? Also, how do you go about requesting an elective ceserean the birth of the first baby? Xenia: Can I demand an elective CS? I am in desperate need of advice and am hoping you will be able to help. On May 6th last year I gave birth to my beautiful daughter after a horrid birth. Let me explain why it was so horrid: I had been having regular contractions and pushing for 10 hours, and was becoming very uncomfortable and upset with the lack of progress that I was making. The consultant was called for advice and I was told if I hadn't had the baby in the next hour then she would get the baby out for me. The hour passed and I couldn't carry on anymore after all this time I was no nearer to meeting my baby. The consultant was called again and the decision was made to have an episiotomy and then a ventouse was used. Finally my wonderful little girl was born. The reason I hadn't been able to push my baby out was because her umbilical cord was too short and it didn't help that my womb tilts back. I was then painfully stitched up and was left to get on with being a mummy. I found moving in general painful after the birth and 6 days after giving birth it was discovered that a stitch had come out and that the episiotomy was breaking down. I was told that I didn't need to worry, as the wound would still heal. A few days later I was finding walking, sitting etc. very painful. I had an infection where the stitch had come out and was prescribed antibiotics, which upset my breastfed baby. This scenario continued for weeks and months; I was on and off the antibiotics, and as a result of this I decided to give up breastfeeding as my daughter was getting a lot of tummy aches due to the antibiotics that I was constantly on. I was finding it hard to feel human because everything I tried to do was hassle as I was always uncomfortable, so I decided enough is enough and went to see my doctor (who is great and very understanding). I was referred to the hospital and it was decided that I would need to have a Fenton's Repair operation under general anaesthetic (this was done 4 months after giving birth). A few months after that I was feeling lots better and was finally back to my old self. My husband and I had wanted to have another baby soon, as we didn't want to have a big age gap and in March this year we found out that I was pregnant again. Whilst attending my antenatal appointments with my midwife I have expressed my feeling that I definitely didn't want another natural birth and have said this time round I would like to elect for a CS. I asked my midwife if she thought that would be possible; her reply was that I had a very good case as the last delivery went bad and that I'd needed an operation 4 months after. I have got an appointment next Tuesday to see the consultant, who would decide if I am able to have an elective CS. I am so nervous, but cannot wait to see him to know if I can have a CS. Since trying for our second child I have searched in books and the internet trying to find out my rights on demanding a CS; many people have said to me that they would be very surprised if I was told that I couldn't have a CS after what I went through, but I want to get the decision from the consultant. I have been so worried about the second birth and know that I will be able to relax once it is confirmed that I can elect for a CS. I have heard that I can elect for a CS on maternal grounds and on clinical grounds? PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE can you give me some advice so I can get the birth I want, I don't mind if I have to go to another hospital, I really just want to know where I stand and what the procedure is. My friend is in a similar position and she was told that she would have to wait till she is 36 weeks till she will be told if she can have a CS or not. What would the difference be between being told at 20 weeks or 36 weeks - hasn't she the right to know now so she can enjoy her pregnancy? I am 20 weeks pregnant, EDD 22nd Dec and I would appreciate any advice you may have as I am very determined and ready to fight for the birth I want. Sharon: Could you please, please help me? I am currently 31 weeks pregnant with my first baby. For the early part of the pregnancy I suppose I was in denial as I didn't have any sickness etc and felt quite 'normal'. When I was approx 4 months pregnant reality hit and I panicked and was not at all sure of continuing with the pregnancy. I booked appointments for terminations but was unable to go through with them. I even considered going abroad for one once I was over the UK limit. My pregnancy has turned into a 'crisis' pregnancy and I am suffering from severe depression, anxiety, am on medication and am receiving the support of a mental health professional/ counsellor. As the pregnancy has affected me so badly psychologically the thought of going through labour and a vaginal birth leaves me traumatised so I have been referred for an elective CS on these grounds. I was also hoping that it would mean that I would not have to carry to full term and that the pregnancy would be over with quicker. Last time I saw my consultant obstetrician he said that they would 'try to get me to 37 weeks' before performing the CS but would consider doing it sooner if my mental health deteriorated. When I saw him yesterday he said that they would not do it until 39 weeks. I was devastated. For someone in my current state of mind for whom every day of the pregnancy is a nightmare an extra 2 or 3 weeks seems like a lifetime. I have heard from a reliable source that some hospitals do elective CS at 37 or even 36 weeks which is what I was hoping for. Do you know of any and what the procedure is for changing obstetrician/hospital? I have been led to believe that I would need a referral from my GP. If I am unable to get this is there another way around it apart from going private? I live in Cheshire, England and would be prepared to travel anywhere for an elective CS at the earliest time any hospital is prepared to do it. Amanda: I am pregnant with my second child and due to a 3rd degree tear with my first have been offered a CS. After a lot of thought I have decided that I will opt for the CS. The hospital that I am booked into does not guarantee that a consultant will perform the operation and that more than likely it will be performed my one of the senior doctors in his team. However another hospital that I could book into locally does guarantee a consultant. Is there anything to suggest that I would be better off changing hospitals and ensuring a consultant performs the surgery? Gabrielle: 'desperately need help' I have just moved to Amsterdam and discovered I am pregnant. I went to the doctor who looked at me like I was half mad for wanting a CS. I know my body though and I know what is right. Can anyone please recommend me a doctor here who is good at and helpful about CS deliveries or would it be better for me to travel internationally to have the baby (I am Australian)? I really need your advice. Lucy: I am 35 weeks pregnant and have a great fear of giving birth. I have also been told that my baby is bigger than average. I have tried to talk to my midwife but without any success. I was made to feel ashamed of fearing labour. I fully understand the risks and am fully informed. Please could put me in contact with an obstetrician who could help me? Allison: We seem to have forgotten that the goal of pregnancy is not to have a 'natural' childbirth at all costs, but a healthy mother and baby. Birthing must be brought into the political agenda. As long as mothers suffer in silence, this will be a personal issue, and not a political one. Which means the stories of horrific birth will be repeated, over and over. Until it becomes political, each woman will have to fight her own battle against the entire medical system. She may also have to fight the cultural prejudices of her family and friends. Charlotte: Do you know where I can find out if there is a private clinic who carry out elective CS or whether an NHS hospital near me would consider it? My partner and I planning to start a family soon. Stefania: My doctor fears that my baby is measuring large for dates. I have an appointment next Thursday for a scan to assess the size of the baby. I would prefer an elective CS because I had a long and difficult labour with my first child, who was delivered by ventouse. I tore badly then and experienced lack of sexual desire for almost a year after. My question is this: Can I request an elective CS on the NHS? How likely are they to accept? Josephine: I am weighing up the pros and cons of a vaginal delivery versus a CS as I am expecting twins. I had a waterbirth with my first daughter which was surprisingly easy as I was expecting childbirth to be agonising and was open to the idea of using drugs if needed. I can't find much information on the after effects of a CS on your website. I am not so concerned about the operation as if it is safer for the babies then that is what I have to do. I am more worried about the pain of the scar, trying to breastfeed twins while not being able to sit up and not being able to pick up my toddler when I get back from hospital. I think it would be helpful if the website could provide more information about this aspect. |
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